Guest Post: Is a Relationship Advisable in Uni?
11:00:00 AM
In line with the current Pep Talk With Dedun topic, Relationships in Uni, I asked the writer (who is done with Uni) if it is advisable to have a relationship while in the University (first degree studies) and this was his response below (mostly for guys but he dropped something for the ladies).
The course of study in the University spans between late teenage to early adults (nowadays though, with little exception to the norm) and it is known that there is an increase in the level of attraction between opposite sex during these years. To answer the question, I will say it is relative and dependent on the following points mostly from a biblical point of view.
Are you a man? It is not good for a man to be alone Genesis 2:18 so God says. But who is this man? First of all, age does not define a man neither does financial adequacy equate relationship/martial competence. So who was God referring to? He was referring to the man that has an identity (he knows who he is). "Let us there for make man in our image (identity) after our likeness (function)" Gen 1:27
Do you know where you are headed? A man would know where he is going and what his assignment is on earth. Gen 2:15 but if you don't know where you are going you can't take someone else along.
A relationship is a journey, the boy today will become the husband tomorrow. These amongst other things I consider to be the foundation, and if the the foundation be destroyed, everything that was built on it will also be destroyed. The foundation has to be solid and that involves preparation. If you are not prepared for the journey, you won't reach your destination. According to Genesis, nothing happened when Eve ate the apple until Adam did, everything changing signifies that the foundation is built by the man.
Not to be selfish, I will also leave a point for the ladies. The previous points also apply to women. In Proverbs 18:22, he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord. The scripture talks about finding a wife before marrying her, so wedding or age does not define 'wifely' attitude but character does. Boaz found Ruth at work, and his servant could testify of her. She wasn't just waiting to be found, she was working on herself. Please ladies don't just stay idle and expect only the man to work on himself before he finds you. You also have to work on yourself and prepare for the journey. When these fundamentals are not on ground amongst other things like emotional stability, compatibility and attraction, etc, heart breaks and costly mistakes becomes inevitable. And that brings me to the final conclusion that if you are not ready for the journey, don't embark on it. Like in reality, you need to feed yourselves before you start a journey. Relate that to the spiritual realm, you need to feed your spirit because it's the spiritual fuel that will refill you when the journey gets tiring. In addition, don't just get into a relationship with anyone, be compatible!
Nery Collins
Are you a man? It is not good for a man to be alone Genesis 2:18 so God says. But who is this man? First of all, age does not define a man neither does financial adequacy equate relationship/martial competence. So who was God referring to? He was referring to the man that has an identity (he knows who he is). "Let us there for make man in our image (identity) after our likeness (function)" Gen 1:27
Do you know where you are headed? A man would know where he is going and what his assignment is on earth. Gen 2:15 but if you don't know where you are going you can't take someone else along.
A relationship is a journey, the boy today will become the husband tomorrow. These amongst other things I consider to be the foundation, and if the the foundation be destroyed, everything that was built on it will also be destroyed. The foundation has to be solid and that involves preparation. If you are not prepared for the journey, you won't reach your destination. According to Genesis, nothing happened when Eve ate the apple until Adam did, everything changing signifies that the foundation is built by the man.
Not to be selfish, I will also leave a point for the ladies. The previous points also apply to women. In Proverbs 18:22, he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord. The scripture talks about finding a wife before marrying her, so wedding or age does not define 'wifely' attitude but character does. Boaz found Ruth at work, and his servant could testify of her. She wasn't just waiting to be found, she was working on herself. Please ladies don't just stay idle and expect only the man to work on himself before he finds you. You also have to work on yourself and prepare for the journey. When these fundamentals are not on ground amongst other things like emotional stability, compatibility and attraction, etc, heart breaks and costly mistakes becomes inevitable. And that brings me to the final conclusion that if you are not ready for the journey, don't embark on it. Like in reality, you need to feed yourselves before you start a journey. Relate that to the spiritual realm, you need to feed your spirit because it's the spiritual fuel that will refill you when the journey gets tiring. In addition, don't just get into a relationship with anyone, be compatible!
Nery Collins
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